The Charge

I must admit to feeling some discomfort over the past couple of months and I came to a conclusion that it must be due to all the 'stuff' that I have been reading on the Internet from both the mainstream and alternative media. Now however a deeper realisation is starting to manifest, a truth (mine) which is, to say the least, not a very pleasant experience. 
Here I must talk about responsibility, absolute responsibility.
I am now convinced that it is not some Illuminati hierarchy or a collective of greedy bankers or indeed even Government itself. It is me as it is everybody else who is a witness wittingly or unwittingly to the insanity. I am guilty and ultimately responsible for what is happening and there is no escape from that, no excuses, nothing.
Truly, this is an affair of the heart, an inner knowing from which there eventually has to come some form of remedy. Yes, that remedy might be to consciously not contribute to what we know deep down inside and believe to be the cause of all the damage.

Now 'I' feel better.

Guilty

The subject is me. A declaration of absolute responsibility for myself.

Well well well

It's been awhile since I blogged and much has transpired.
Unfortunately the marijuana oil did not help with the bladder cancer but I had to try this remedy first based on much internet research. Perhaps it might have been more successful had I tried to grow a plant with higher CDB content rather than high THC. The former, now famously called 'Charlotte's Web' has been very helpful in the State of Colorado with cases of child epilepsy.

So, I finally went to a hospital in Guatemala City called San Juan de Dios around September last year and a group of 4 urologists performed an operation that lasted 7 hours in which they removed the bladder, lymph nodes, appendix, prostate and Seminole glands. Then they made a new bladder from part of my intestine and connected that to the urethra with the removed appendix.

I left the hospital at the end of November with a catheter still inserted because I was unable to control urine flow (leaking) due to overall weakness, my weight was down to 125 lbs from the 160lbs norm. The doctors advised that this form of aggressive cancer as very debilitating and that I would require about 3 months recuperation outside the hospital.
Last month (Feb) my weight was up to 140 lbs and I felt confident that I could now have the catheter removed and went to a local urologist to have that done. It is now almost mid March and I feel very healthy and living a normal lifestyle.

A pleasant interlude

Two weeks have passed since the last operation and one week since the removal of the dreaded catheter. It is with great relief and enthusiasm that I can advise the reader of crystal clear urine with no peeing pain or any other visible abnormalities. Appetite is good and weight gain quite evident as I had lost a few pounds during the last hospital experience.
Now a short story.
About 20 years ago a doctor in Canada advised me to take a small white pill called Allopurinol which assists in the control of uric acid that was responsible for my occasional attacks of gout. This affliction though not serious is very very painful but not wanting to be a pill popper for the rest of my life I declined the advice and relied on aspirin (4 or 5) to reduce the swelling that occasionally manifested in the big toe of my right foot. Well, after 20 years I finally overcame my stubborn resistance and decided to try Allopurinol, the generic version of which is very cheap here in Guatemala. Lo and behold after 5 days the big toe of my right foot provided a performance equal to any previous experience with a corresponding pedastic inability. So I then had to ask John to go to the pharmacy and get some small yellow pills called Colchimedio in an effort to reduce the swelling which proved successful and I am now able meander around painlessly. Later research on the Internet revealed that possible side effects (a polite term for actual effects) include attacks of gout until the body becomes accustomed to the ingestion of Allopurinol.
To the inexperienced reader you may not understand my decision never ever to take that innocuous white pill again and for those who do I sincerely hope that the effects are not similar.

Mother Parama and Yogidog

On a lighter note the photograph is of our resident Yoga Maestra which should not be confused with the German "Jagermeister" which as any heavy drinker will know is a remedy for a serious hangover. Also the reader is urged not to draw any connection between Yogibear and the Yoga dog called 'Peanuts'.

Thanks to Mother Parama for the great photo'.

Dying to live

Yesterday was an interesting trip to the urologist where the catheter was removed and I was returned to a state of peeing normality. Doctor Gilberto Barrilas together with his father actually owned the hospital in Zacapa where I had the operation one week earlier and I should mention that the whole procedure was performed gratis which would normally have cost about 10,000 Quetzales ($1,300).

Canista-sweet-delicious

Once again we discussed options as to how best to proceed and he advised that to remove the bladder was a horrendous operation and this was the reason that he suggested radiation therapy using a technique that did not destroy surrounding tissue. Also in his opinion the cancer had not metastasized (spread) outside of the bladder. Ultrasound had previously revealed abnormal bladder wall thickness but he was unsure whether this had anything to do with the containment.
The subject of this blog may sound like a flippant cliche. This is not the intention of the writer as I am sure some readers may appreciate.

Canista is about the size of a medium mango, mushy texture and very sweet.

Post operation

Arrived at the hospital in Zacapa 6th June and the urologist decided to take an ultrasound of the bladder to see if any new growth. Well he was quite surprised that nothing visible this time which raised my expectations as you can imagine. Surgery the next morning (trans urethral) revealed small nodes surrounding the area that was cauterized almost 4 months earlier.
These nodes were removed and a catheter left in place to keep the bladder dry and not distended with urine which might rupture the surgery. The catheter has to stay in place for a week.
The doctor advised that radiation was my best chance to stop the spread of the cancer as it was still localized within the bladder.
Some weight loss now but no other abnormalities detected. In the meantime Roger brought some mangosteen juice from Texas which actually cured a stage 4 cancer patient and a bottle of this nectar costs around $40.00.
I will update this blog next Saturday when the catheter is removed.

Disappointing news

The tumour started bleeding again yesterday so it looks like another hospital job and some major surgery. Perhaps alternative medicine is not the answer for bladder cancer but may be effective for other types....I don't know.
I feel good apart from the bleeding with no weight loss and good appetite so hopefully it has remained localized.
May be off-line for a few days as this problem is resolved one way or the other.
Chin up to all the other cancer patients who read this blog.